Little Black Girl Lost by Keith Lee Johnson

Author:Keith Lee Johnson [Johnson, Keith L]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Kensington
Published: 2015-04-08T04:00:00+00:00

Chapter 42

“I have some terrible news.”

Having extinguished the fire that burned in them, Johnnie and Lucas lay in bed exhausted, looking up at the ceiling. Johnnie contemplated the differences between Earl and Lucas, wondering if it was the size that made the difference. Then it came to her. It wasn’t the size at all. It was how she felt about the two men. Sex with Earl was an obligation. Sex with Lucas was even more pleasurable than masturbation because it wasn’t just the climax that made the experience mind-blowing. It was the taste of his kiss, the warmth of his body, the intoxicating scent of him, and the flavor he emitted. She cared for Lucas, but she didn’t feel the same way for Earl, so quite naturally, she deduced it would be better with a man she cared about.

I wonder if I’m in love with Lucas. Is this what love feels like? Is sex supposed to feel this way? I hope Lucas enjoyed it. I want to be a good lover to him. I want us to be together forever. I guess I do love him if I—

“You thinkin’ about your mom, Johnnie?”

“No. I was thinking about you,” she said and faced him. “Am I a good lover, Lucas?”

“Yes.”

“You mean it?” Johnnie asked, desperately wanting to please him.

“Yes, the best ever.”

Johnnie resisted the urge to ask him how many women he’d had. She feared that if she asked him, he could ask her. Even though she had only been with Earl, Martin Winters would be coming by for a date one day soon.

“Lucas, do you think I’ll end up like Blanche Dubois?”

“I was hoping that movie didn’t bother you, Johnnie.”

“You were?”

“Yes. I watched that story and I was thinkin’, boy, we picked the wrong day to go to the movies.”

“Well, to tell you the truth, I did feel like that was me up there on the screen. I felt so sorry for that woman.”

“I didn’t.”

“You didn’t?”

“Hell naw.”

“Why?”

“As long as colored folks have to fear white folks, I don’t give a damn what happens to ’em. You think they care about us? Everywhere we go we gotta wait until they’re finished then take whatever they don’t want. Like tonight. We have to sit in the balcony if we wanna see a movie. Why? Because they don’t wanna sit up there.”

“Next time, let’s just go to the Sepia Theater on Main Street. Then we can sit wherever you want.”

“Okay, but the shit just pisses me off, ya know. Like if we want something as simple as a drink of water, we have to drink from a rusted fountain. And where’s the fountain? Right next to a clean, sparkling white fountain. If they don’t want us to drink the same water from the same fountain, fine. But why does our fountain have to be rusted and theirs in perfect workin’ condition? When we get books at our school, how come the white folks had it first? How come we gotta bow our heads

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.